Trans men in Azerbaijan face severe challenges when trying to express their gender identity. In an environment where society, especially their families, finds it difficult to accept them, leading their daily lives becomes a significant problem. They struggle to survive independently while confronting both legal and social obstacles.
Samir1 is one of the people involved in this struggle. Samir is currently 21 years old, and he started his fight at a very young age. Samir played the violin when he was younger. However, when he entered adolescence, his family forbade him from pursuing his passion.
"Because I played the violin well, my teachers wanted to take me to concerts, which my family did not like. Because in their mindset, I was a girl, and there was no place for me on stage or television. This did not align with the values of a family living in Shamakhi. My family pulled me out of music and restricted my social life as well."
Perceiving him as a woman and therefore, understanding his fame as improper, Samir's mother told him to go straight from home to school and back, saying that playing outside was no longer suitable for a girl. “At that time, I was sharing a room with my older brother, and we slept next to each other. On the first day of my period, when I got up early in the morning, I realized there were significant biological and physical differences between my brother and me. Until then, my family had treated me like a boy, even giving me a nickname at home, calling me 'Elchin2 The fact that my brother was a boy, and I had been calling myself a boy too, confused me. How could we be so different?!” Samir said.
Alakbar’s family, coming from Russia3 also refused to recognize his gender identity from a very young age. He said, "When I was a child, I used to say I was a boy, and when my mother said the opposite, I would start crying. I thought my mother told me I wasn’t a boy to annoy me."
The 22-year-old Alakbar once struggled with understanding his gender identity. For a long time, he identified as a cisgender lesbian rather than a trans man because he was afraid of undergoing hormone therapy. By the time he was 16 or 17, his family had already begun to question his behavior.
"One day my phone was broken. I tried to repair it myself because I had a partner at the time, and if my family took the phone to be repaired, my messages could be exposed. This raised their suspicions, they began questioning me, and the phone issue was uncovered. During this time, they also accessed the second phone I was using and read my conversations with others [trans people]. They accused me of immorality, and everyone's attitude toward me changed. They even beat me. After it was repaired, the phone was not given to me but to my sister."
When Alakbar was 17, in 2018, his family's reactions became so intense that he started thinking about moving out. His family tried to force him to dress as a woman. He remembers that they made him wear a bra and a dress, and on his way to school, he would take off the bra and put it back on before coming home.
Escape to the Capital
"I had packed a bag and saved up some money to leave quickly in case of an emergency. My mother found the bag, and a fight broke out. My sister took the bag, grabbed my arm, and kicked me out of the house. My mom started crying, so I quickly grabbed my bag and left. I contacted a friend to help me get to Baku. I got on a bus to the terminal, but by the time I arrived, my mom had already reached it in a local taxi and was waiting for me. I felt cornered. My mother started beating me in front of so many people, shouting, 'Where do you think you're going?’ She punched me in the head, and even the police from the terminal came over and said, 'Either you go with your mom, or you come with us to the station!' Ultimately, I refused and said I was going to Baku. My mother took my phone and said, ‘You can contact your friend through the bus driver's phone.’"
Samir also faced severe domestic violence from his family. He says that from a young age, he was made the scapegoat in the family and was subjected to both physical and psychological abuse. He had a girlfriend in the village, and his family discovered their messages.
"After my conversations with that girl became known to my family, and after I cut my hair short during the quarantine in 2020, they took me to doctors and mullahs. They forced me to take drugs. They took me to 41 different mullahs. I was prescribed psychotropic drugs. They asked me my name and age and prescribed medicine, but the doctors never asked, 'What is your problem?' One doctor even said, 'Many kids like you come to me. I prescribe them medication, and when they don’t take it, I give them injections.' That doctor also prescribed me medicine and injections. They would beat me while giving me those injections. After those injections and medications, my body went numb. I couldn’t eat, go to the bathroom, or move, and I would sleep for hours. The drugs were so strong I couldn’t even walk."
The pressures faced by LGBTQ+ community members, especially trans men, due to superstitious beliefs imposed by their families go beyond these examples. In 2022, in an article I wrote titled "If My Family Supported Me" for Chaikhana Media, I spoke of a trans man named Chinar who also experienced similar challenges from his family.
22-year-old Chinar said that it is more difficult to be queer in regional areas where everyone knows each other and, unlike the capital city of Baku, people value close family relationships, conservatism, and religion.
"Our community is a closed one, and they find such things strange. My relatives do not understand how such a thing can happen. The transphobic environment truly held me back. I started shying away from people and became a closed-off person. My anxiety and panic started. I didn't want to go out in public because I didn't look exactly the way I wanted. I was even ashamed of my voice."
At that time, Samir was studying at a university in a large Azerbaijani city. One day, he left home under the pretense of going to university but instead went to the bus station in Baku. He bought tickets for both himself and his girlfriend and took a bus together to Turkey through Iran. They stayed in Turkey for three and a half months, and despite great difficulties, they managed to settle there, though Samir’s family hadn’t given up on finding them. He recalls the moment:
"My landlord called and said, ‘Samir, they are looking for you.’ I quickly left work, went home, and turned on the TV. They were showing me on a popular search program on Azerbaijani television. Both the Azerbaijani and Turkish police had reported me as a thief. They already knew my address. My family called me and said, ‘We will catch the girl next to you, rape and beat her to death.’ I was extremely worried because I felt responsible for her. They suggested that I go to Moscow to stay with my relative and not return to them. To avoid risking her life any further, I had to cut off contact with her, send her back to Azerbaijan, and go to Russia to stay with my relative. Following my family's orders, my relative forced me to take drugs, brutally beat me, broke my left arm, damaged one of my eyes, and caused permanent vision problems. He broke my humerus and three or four of my ribs. They forced me to do heavy labor for hours, beating me constantly until nightfall."
After months of enduring severe torture, his relative eventually had to take Samir to a doctor to keep him from dying. He asked the doctor
“‘Why isn't this child getting better despite all our efforts?’ After the examination, the doctor said I had to stay there for treatment. However, the doctor added, 'This child doesn't speak Russian, and I don't trust you or the interpreter you've hired.' Because of this, they refused to admit me to the hospital."
The documentary film Herman broadcast on the feminist platform Femmekan is about the life of a transgender man living in Baku. Struggling with the pressures of his family life and the prejudices of society, Herman makes a difficult decision, to begin hormone therapy. In the film, Herman shares that at the age of 16, he told his family he was a trans boy, which led to his mother disowning him. Reflecting on those days in the documentary, Herman says:
“I fought through living through my adolescence. Boys have always been valuable to my parents. They always did everything they could for my brothers. But the people I loved the most were the ones who hurt me the most.”
Alakbar recalls that his classmates, and even the school psychologist, knew he wanted to leave and supported his decision. His physics teacher was somewhat informed about his gender identity and had advised him not to get involved in activism or political matters, as it could be very dangerous. The day his mother took away his ID card, his father returned from Moscow to Azerbaijan, further complicating his emotional state.
“Since my mother took my ID card, I couldn’t use intercity transportation. I showed a picture of my ID, but when they refused [to let me through], I lied and said, 'I have to go to a competition tomorrow, please let me through!' They believed my lie, and I managed to get to Baku. I found a job and settled here. Later, I saw my name on search websites. My family hadn’t fully given up on me, so they had put out a search notice on news sites. So, I went to the police station and informed them that I had left of my own will, which meant the police couldn’t officially search for me. However, my name and photo were already on various search announcements online. After some time, the police called me. When I went to the station, I saw that my parents were there. The police tried to force me to return to my parents, but I refused. They even threatened me with arrest, but I still didn’t agree. In the end, they recorded a video where I confirmed that I had left home of my own will, and they forced me to let my father see where I was living. At that time, I was staying with a landlord, and I had told them I didn’t have a family and had grown up in an orphanage. When my father showed up, my landlord got angry and demanded that I leave the house."
Moving Forward with Hope
Alakbar has not given up. He says he could handle both his work and education independently. During this time, his life became more stable, and the violence from his family eventually stopped. He also mentioned that, after him, his sister ran away to Baku due to similar family pressures [concerning her fashion choices]. He remains in contact with his sister, and they now live their lives more stably and comfortably. Alakbar has started hormone therapy and now feels free to wear the clothes he wants and socialize with the people he chooses.
For Samir, living independently still means facing significant obstacles. He was eventually brought back to Azerbaijan from Russia. Since he had previously been falsely accused of theft, upon entering the country, he was held in detention for a day. Afterward, his phone and documents were handed over to his family. According to Samir, his family kept him confined at home for almost two years, isolating him from any social interaction. The only times he was allowed outside were to be taken to a doctor or a mullah. When I asked him how he managed to get through the difficult quarantine period, he initially paused, speechless. Then, he started laughing and said, "My favorite part!" before continuing his story.
Now, Samir says his life has changed thanks to the support of the LGBTQ+ community. They provided him with a warm and welcoming space. He even managed to restore the documents his family burned, obtain legal protection, and find a job. Samir has future goals as well—he wants to return to music and, after moving to a safer place, plans to contribute to his community and work towards positive change.
Namiq Abdullayev, a social worker from the Gender Resource Center in Azerbaijan, which provides psychosocial support to LGBTQ+ individuals, describes the domestic violence and harassment trans men face at the hands of their families. He explains that trans men frequently hear phrases like "act like a woman" or "behave like a girl" from their families and are often forced into household chores, subjected to physical violence, and labeled as "sick," which leads to them being forced to take various medications.
"Although resources are limited, with the individual's resilience, we can achieve progress together. The priority is to help the person distance themselves from the violent family and ensure they are in a safer environment. The law states that individuals have the right not to be subjected to violence, regardless of their gender identity or sexual orientation. However, unfortunately, when it comes to enforcing these rights, the relevant authorities often prefer to turn a blind eye," he says.
Conclusion
Summarizing the feedback from my respondents, it is clear that trans men in Azerbaijan face widespread domestic violence, which affects them physically and psychologically and leads to economic, social, and psychological isolation. Trans men often experience violence from family members because their gender identity is not accepted by their families. This situation results in severe psychological trauma, a lack of support mechanisms, and life-altering challenges that are difficult to overcome. The absence of legal and social support exacerbates the issue, leaving trans men more vulnerable. Victims of domestic violence, particularly trans men, frequently find themselves unable to access legal protection, which leaves them trapped in violent environments. As both of my respondents emphasized, they were unaware of any volunteers or support systems for LGBTIQ+ individuals during their struggles. As a result, they have been subjected to repeated violence and profound psychological distress.
The content of the article is the sole responsibility of the author and can in no way be taken to reflect the views of the Heinrich Boell Foundation Tbilisi Office - South Caucasus Region
